On Piercing Children’s Ears

In the past few days, a topic cropped up on a social media parenting group I am part of: parent’s piercing their children’s ears. Most comments on the thread pertained to a similar sentiment; it is wrong. Though the degrees to which these mothers objected to the practise varied rather. From “it’s child abuse” to “I wouldn’t chose to, but if a child asks for long enough, it’s their decision, and you are being too judgemental.” Here I will explain to you masochistic readers why it is wrong. Be forwarned, I will be writing as if my opinion is fact. Object all you please. I will also be using quotes from actual mothers, but no names will be used to protect the women on the private forum.

Piercing a child’s ears is tantamount to child abuse. A piercing is a body modification, whether it be your ears, or your nipples, it is a hole being made through your body with a sharp implement. This is not something that should be practised on children. Children of all ages from as young as a few weeks old (yes weeks!) are being punctured by guns in the name of adornment and vanity.

“I walk past Claire’s [Claire’s Accessories; the main shop in question with regard to child piercing] daily and have wept frequently to see tiny tiny infants literally being held down by their families. I’ve seen the staff member try and distract a mortally terrified child by waving a f*cking Bic biro in their face. I also think it should be illegal. If someone stuck a needle through, I dunno, a baby’s finger web, it would be called abuse, yet this is allowed”

Yes. An earlobe is as much a part of a person’s anatomy as a finger, lip, nose, foot, vagina, anything! So why is it so readily accepted for adults to punch a hole in them? It should not be. Any injury of a similar nature anywhere else on the body would be reported, and the parents rightfully punished. Parents aren’t allowed to go around piercing their infants’ noses, lips or eyebrows. Parents aren’t allowed to create holes in other parts of their child’s body using a high speed gun. Ears should be no different. The piercing process itself is painful, and that’s without the almost inevitable risk of infection or further injury. Why would a parent choose to put their child through a painful procedure?

“A girl I knew got her 11 month old daughter’s ears pierced. She wrote on Facebook ‘she may have been a pickle and cried lots but at least she looks pretty'”

Fucking pretty??! Seriously? Fuck off. Sexist objectification even at an infant age? Is there no hope? Now, I will qualify what I say by letting you know I am aware that this practise does occur on male children. However, the majority of offenses are upon female children. Parents see their new little daughters as pretty little objects that need to be made even prettier, for people to look at. Parents are literally injuring their infants to make them more physically attractive. I’ve even heard of parents that believed their daughter was not cute enough and people would think she was a boy, so the piercings would make her cuter, and confirm her gender. (Don’t even get my started on enforcing gender on children.) In who’s eyes is this an acceptable thing to do?

“…it really makes me sad to see babies with pierced ears, it’s like saying:

No sweetheart, I know u are only 6 months so can’t understand what I’m saying but mummy has made a decision that your ears are ugly and boring so I’m going to shove dirty little needles through ur skin using a dirty machine that can’t be properly cleaned. It’s okay, mummy loves you but really doesn’t care if you’re in pain, scared or they get infected I just can’t wait to see those little gold hoops dangle from your ears.”

What about the ones who justify (excuse*) their actions; because at least the child won’t have to suffer the pain in later life. At least they won’t remember it. Right? Yeah. Wonderful. Because pierced ears are clearly a necessary requirement for being female. And I’ve had piercings as an adult, and I’m pretty sure an adult is much more capable of coping with the pain. And at least comprehend why you are being put through pain for a body modification that you chose to do. And properly capable of maintaining it.

Piercings must be regularly cleaned and taken care of properly, and even once fully healed, the piercee (for lack of a better word) must consistently be conscious of the piercing, and cautious of their actions to prevent injury from tearing, ripping or pulling. An infant will play with their ears, especially if they are stinging from an open wound. They will get food, or snot or other germs transfer from their grubby fingers into said open wound. They will tug and pull at the metal bar now stuck in their flesh, possibly ripping it open, preventing proper healing, reopen in a partially healed tunnel, pinch their lobe too tight in the butterfly clip, or just plain pulling their earlobe so much it hurts.

“At the Royal Hospital for Sick Children in Edinburgh, consultant Dr Tom Beattie said he had treated children as young as eight months for infections caused by the butterfly entering the ear lobe. He said: ‘We see them at the rate of about one or two a week. I would not recommend piercing for pre-teenagers.'”

Older children, under the age of about twelve or more, are made for playing, it is what they are best at. Paying due care and attention to a piercing is not. Children do not have a good enough grasp on infectious disease control to understand how to effectively keep an open wound sterile. They do not consciously think about possibly ripping their earlobe off while playing ructiously on a rope net at an adventure playground.

“My parents wouldn’t allow me to have my ears pierced until I was 18yrs!!!! I’m really pleased they were that strict about it. I remember being on work experience in A&E when a little girl (under 5yrs) came in and her stud earring had been pulled back into her ear. Total mess, poor thing.”

For those that say children of an older age who consistently ask to have their ears pierced should be allowed, as they have made a choice about their body. Yes, children are people too, and they too should be allowed bodily autonomy; making choices for their own body, hair cuts and clothing etc. But we draw the line at allowing tattoos, sex and other modifications, because they don’t have enough knowledge and understanding to make that choice. So why piercing the ears? A pre-teen, surrounded by media and society subconciously telling them that girls should conform to a certain beauty standard, and are not yet truly capable of understanding the impact of sexist social pressures, probably fall into the trap of believing they need their ears pierced. It is a parent’s responsibility to protect and educate their children from/about these pressures; not feed into them. I was allowed to have my ears pierced at the age of twelve. They soon became painfully infected, so I removed them and the holes healed (with a lump of scar tissue that is still present). I then re-pierced them a year or so later, only to have the same thing happen again. Now, as a woman in her early twenties, I am glad I don’t have ear piercings. I do not feel any need to wear pretty dangling jewels in my ears. And I regret begging my mother to pay so much money to do it. It was a waste. Now, as an adult, I reserve the right to choose to have ear piercings when I decide, and this is something that is very important to me; my own bodily autonomy. It’s a reassurance that I get to make informed decisions about my own body; beyond piercings, to my tattoos, consensual sexual choices and reproductive rights. I know you may say I’m taking this issue too deep, but consent is important. And things like piercing a child, are a piece of straw on the back of the camel that is girls objectification and lack of consent.

I, and other bodily modified parents consistently get asked “so when will the kids have their first tattoos?”.

“When she decides if she wants to have a tattoo when she’s old enough to be done at a professional studio.”

Exactly right. When they decide. Not you. If tattoos are something an individual should have the choice to do, then so are piercings. I am aware there is a permanency difference, but they are one and the same when it comes to individual choice to modify your body. A piercing is something you own. It is part of you. How can someone ever feel a modification is truly theirs, part of them, if they played no real part in the choice to get it?

Having gained a lot of experience in tattoo/piercing shops, and around tattooists and piercers, I am well versed in the importance of proper clinical hygiene and professional training when it comes to performing a body modification. Do you really think that a shop assistant received proper training and qualifications in piercing? Probably not. If they had, they would be working in a piercing shop. And the corner of a well travelled children’s accessory shop? Most definitely not a sterile environment.
Anyone who knows anything about piercing would never get a piercing done in this environment with a gun. A piercing should always be performed with the proper sterile needle and equipment.

What this really boils down to is, children are not accessories to be prettified to your standards at the detriment to their health.

Stop doing it.